Love Wins Wedding Officiant: Is it Love? Part I

Love is a strong emotion. Often it is confused with its close, yet lesser cousin, infatuation. So how can one tell if what they are feeling is love or its often camouflaged look alike infatuation? One scripture that I am asked to incorporate more frequently than any other in my ceremonies is found in the book of 1 Corinthians. That scripture, penned by the Apostle Paul, I consider to be the perfect measuring stick for determining whether what you are feeling is love and whether the person that you are about to marry is truly in love with you. We all know the scripture

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 ⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ⁸Love never fails.
Over the next 15 days I will take this well known and beloved scripture and attempt to define what for me is the definition of what true love looks like when it is in action. Please keep in mind that as humans we are so far from perfection that hitting each of these 15 bench mark qualities perfectly is not going to happen. However, it should be evident to you and to the person who professes their love for you that these qualities reign supreme. Any glaring discrepancies should give you pause. Let's begin. Paul begins with telling us that "love is patient". Patience is a quality not easily mastered. It takes time and even the most patient of souls can find themselves "losing it". However, when you love someone and they love you, patience is one hallmark you should see displayed consistently. It takes many forms in a relationship such as listening to your spouse tell the same story or joke over and over. Perhaps it means watching their favorite television show every week, even if you don't like that particular show. Yet patiently sitting through it, without complaining means so much to them. Patience helps us tolerate their flaws and become more compassionate and generous in our extending forgiveness to our partner for minor personality quirks and larger transgressions. Patience will aid us in being merciful. Patience carries with it the "feel" that we may be called upon to assume a measure of discomfort so as to alleviate the suffering of the person we love. Doing so without a complaining spirit. Is your interactions with your partner ones seasoned with a spirit of patience? Does your partner display a patient spirit in their dealing with you? If there is a marked absence of this defining quality in your interactions with your partner or from your partner, don't immediately give up, all is not necessarily lost. Patience can be cultivated. It is only the first benchmark on this list. Everyday renew your efforts to be patient in dealing with your partner. Patience it like a muscle that must be exercised frequently so as to maintain its strength, tone and flexibility. Tomorrow I will discuss the second mark of true love that Paul listed. I hope you will join me then. Do you have an example of patience? What would you add to make the definition of patient more personalized? Can you recall a time when your spouse displayed a measure of patience that absolutely amazed you? How do you practice patience on a day to day basis? I would love to hear your positive stories. Please feel free to share by leaving me a comment!